


cracked

by nekokoban



Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Bookverse AU, Gen, Implied Child Abuse, Madness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-02
Updated: 2013-02-02
Packaged: 2017-11-27 21:35:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/666740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nekokoban/pseuds/nekokoban
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He didn't open the door.  Therein was his downfall.</p>
            </blockquote>





	cracked

**Author's Note:**

> From [this prompt](http://rotg-kink.dreamwidth.org/2200.html?thread=3059096#cmt3059096) on the kinkmeme.

_on marchesday_

_(on days in march in threes and fours)_

_they sing him the songs of her voice, the fragments and shards that they use to drive memory under his skin, under his nails, they poundpoundpound they worm poison into him they sing her favorite song they sing her dying screams they sing her her herherherherherher_

On Moonsday, the fearlings spend the entire day screaming. They work in gradients of age, from the wailing of a frightened infant to the cries of a young woman trapped in the dark.

They are all the same voice.

It starts as a cascade, going up the ages from the youngest (she had been a finicky child and only her mother's voice could sooth her, and even now he would admit some jealousy over that) to slightly older (she had sobbed for hours after the news of her mother's fall had come, and even when he'd rocked her and held her close those sobs had taken too, too long to stop), to the age she must be by now (did she even remember him; if she was afraid, did she know that if she cried out his name he would come running--)

(come running?)

(come come come come daddy i'm so scared)

(pǝɹɐɔs os ɯ,ı ʎppɐp ǝɯoɔ)

_on frogsday with the frogs that sing in colors of black and blood there is crying so much crying she cannot ever stop crying and it hurts, it hurts like blows and he can hear those too; they strike her over and over and she chokes and there is wetness in her voice, there is the gurgling of a pierced lung and a torn throat and she cries to him_

_daddy daddy please_

_and he puts both hands against the doors and he pushes against them because he is not a man he is a hero he is not human he is an ideal he is not a father he is a guardian_

_and there are things so much greater than he can touch but he just wants to see her again he wants to touch her he wantswantswantswants_

On Sunsday they realize their tactics still aren't working, and they beat her. Or they pretend to, and he can't deny that he has never wished more to simply step away -- to walk out of this damned prison and never have to look back.

But it will be a long time, if ever, that he will have relief. There is the trust of an entire universe riding on his shoulders and he cannot crack. He is not allowed to

ʞ ɔ ɐ ɹ ɔ

_on messday it's messy messy messmessmess they have torn her pretty dress her pretty scarves they have wrapped her up like a fly in a web and her arms are spread and her legs are open_

_no daddy no please daddy no she says and he hears his own voice laughing and maybe he's the one laughing maybe it is him and her face is tearstained in the dark as she gasps for breath and her flesh is so soft so soft so soft sosososososo_

_she claws at her bindings as the rest swarm her and she cries and she screams and she is beautiful he loves her she's his good girl he wants nothing more than to justjustjustjustjustjustjust_

He wakes from nightmares that have him vomitting over the side of his cot, and then he collapses back upon it, uncaring of the mess he has left. His stomach still spasms with every breath, and there is bile and acid in his throat. He is not a monster. He is not. He isn't.

(but she had been so soft in his dream; she had been soft and it had been her living moving face, not the stiff painted likeness of a portrait in a locket)

My dear in the arms of the stars, he thought, I do not know how long I will be able to stand this. They will keep this up until I am mad. Perhaps I am already. Where is your pride in me now?

She had been so glad to have a daughter, he remembered, even if the inconvenience of pregnancy had made her snappish and impatient -- she had smiled at him so tenderly with the newborn infant in her arms. Look, she has your eyes and your

buıɥʇʎɹǝʌǝ

_on bloodsday he claws at the walls and the doors but they will not open to him; he screams and he begs and he says he will he says he will do it but pleasepleaseplease just let her go but they laugh at him and they say_

_oh no_

_oh no_

_it is time to play_

_and she screams and he laughs and she cries and he wails and he draws banners with his own blood and he lies down alone_

_and_  
cold  
in  
the  
dark 

_he closes his eyes and he breathes and she screams and she moans and he can't he mustn't he just_

_goes_  
to  
d ǝ ǝ ן s 


End file.
